Moment of death

What does it feel like at the moment of impending death?


I want to change the conversation to involve a little sharing on my part. I want to share this with you - dear Universe. It is a true account of an incident related to me by a friend. 

My first trip to the Gold Coast beach, Queensland's sunshine coast, almost ended up in disaster. With an advertisement tag line "Beautiful one day perfect the next", the Gold Coast became a mecca for young sun-seekers and surfers. I decided to take on surfing foolishly thinking it was no more than simply hiring a surfboard, paddle out to sea far enough to catch a big wave back to shore. How hard would that be and I have seen it all on TV? I was soon to find out.

Just like the surfers on TV, I paddled out to sea, riding the waves easily. When I thought I had gotten far enough and the breaking waves were sufficiently large enough to catch back to shore, I positioned myself for a fun ride back to shore. With great effort I tried to turn around to face the shore and struggled with the board and the waves. I found it hard to stay on the shore-side of the waves before they broke. With the buoyancy of the surfboard I floated easily over the waves only to be dragged further out by the rip current. Realising imminent danger, I struggled to keep control trying to stay on the shore side of the waves but failed every time. With every wave, I was dragged even further out to sea.

After numerous attempts I started to feel tired and thought it was time I got off the surfboard and waded ashore. It was then I realised that I was out too far; my feet did not touch ground. I was in deeper waters than I thought. A sense of panic gripped me as I looked towards the shore. It looked too far for me to swim, as I was not a strong swimmer. I thought a better option was to hang on to the board and try to 'surf' back to shore. The waves pounded on me continuously; I kept slipping off the surfboard struggling to stay afloat, knowing if I let go, I would not have enough energy to swim ashore. By this time I knew I was in trouble, too exhausted to swim and unable to 'surf' back to shore. Panic turned into trembling fear making it even harder to hang on to the board. The waves continued pounding and I knew I was fighting a losing battle. I was in near exhaustion fighting to stay afloat whist dealing with the gripping fear of drowning.  Just as my energy level was just about depleted, one particularly large wave crashed over me, dragging me under. With the board torn off my clutching hands and my body gripped with trembling fear, I was dragged down into the depths of the ocean. It felt like I was in a large washing machine going through its final washing cycle.

 As I tumbled underwater, I realised it was all over. It was the end of the struggle to hang on to my life and to survive.  Overwhelmed by intense fear and panic I remember saying to myself "You are gone now! You will drown."

Suddenly there was complete silence.

The moment moved in slow motion.

And with outstretched arms, my final thoughts were "Take me!"

The feeling then was one I would never forget. At that moment there was no more fear, just complete peace in readiness to be taken. It was as if once I had given up the struggle and surrender to the moment the end was peace and quietness.

Death and peace seemed to co-exist. Fear did not exist in the moment of death.

Then my feet touched the ground. I found my balance, got to my feet and stood up to ear-high water level. The large wave must have pushed me towards shore. Almost immediately fear and panic exploded in me. I had a fighting chance to survive, I was given a second chance in life. Struggling to maintain balance on tiptoes, I headed for shore trembling and perspiring. When I reached the warm sand of the shore, I slumped on the beach, breathing life sustaining air - lying in the sun, thanking the universe for not taking me.

"Breathtakingly true"....... Universe finally said something.

What is Success?

We are already a few days into Autumn, but Melbourne is refusing to let Summer go showing a perfect day with 27 degrees, bright sunshine and light breeze. I have just finally set my chilli plant free from pot to the ground - a successful transplant. I am looking forward to more wonderful red chillis in months to come.

Admiring my new chilli plant amongst the Loofahs and chives, I thought. "I had a successful day in the garden"

"What is being successful in life means?" Universe interrupted my mind.

"Wow, a little heavy at this time of the day?" sipping my cool ice drink reaching for my keyboard to record this conversation.

"May be a Ferrari and a villa in the South of France, exotic dinners and parties, power, recognition, status, happy family, children, etc, etc " I could go on and on and on..... testing the Universe.

"Is that so?" Universe interjected.

If you ask the same question to 100 people I bet most would say similar things but with varying emphasis.

"Is that so?"

Frankly I am getting tired of this answer. I thought it serves no purpose and it is rather annoying to get the same answer all the time.

"Can we stop the "is that so?" bit and move on?" Getting frustrated.

"The world will tell you that success is about achieving what you set out to do. They will tell you that success is about winning, being financially secure, recognition and so forth. But let me tell you they are only by products of success. They are not success"

"I am listening" getting interested.

"You cannot become successful, you can only BE successful. The world doesn't tell you this, because it doesn't know"

"I really do not get you" keeping my fingers poised ready for the answer I am going to post.

 "What is "BE successful?"

" Simply instil a sense of quality in everything you do, even for the most simplest things. You do this by realising that the outcome of your future rests entirely with what you are doing now. Realise that there are no other moments except this moment. So give this moment its fullest attention. In other words be successful in everything you do NOW."

"Wait a minute, well does this not mean that we do not plan? What about what we want to achieve in the future? Our careers, our family etc?"

"I never said not to plan and I never said you do not consider the future. What I am saying is if planning is what you can do for the moment - give it the fullest attention. Even with a plan/journey, the primary step is the step you are doing now, because this moment is all you ever have. What you encounter at the destination can only be determined by quality of this particular step at this particular moment."

"So what has this got to do with successful?"

 "Simply this, when your doing is infused with the quality of Being, then you cannot help but BE successful. This will apply to whatever you choose to do."

"Well if this is case then would we ever achieve something big if all we ever do is focus on minute little moments every second?"

"The great can only arise out of honouring and caring for small things. Do you not know that Apple Corporation came out of passion and attention to small details in the garage of Mr & Mrs Jobs? Did Steve Jobs ever think of having a company that has the largest capitalisation in the world when he was in this garage? He only gave his full attention to doing what he was doing at that moment and at every moment. When Steve and Wozniak first assembled those 12 circuit boards they focused on making the best boards."

"Heard of the saying - The journey of a 1000 steps starts with this step - each step being just as important as the next."

"You will only ever have the present moment - regardless of our grand plans and past experiences, we only have this moment to create and the result of this creation is totally dependent on the quality of what we do NOW. When you make what you do or where you are as the main purpose of your life, until the next change, then this awareness becomes very powerful. It means acceptance, it means doing the best and it means none attachment. Change is a given, accept it, work with it and know that in whatever situation you find yourself in, it too will pass"

"Practice this and this will be your success"

Silence.........

Letting Go

A relative whom I have not spoken to for more than 10 years rang me out of the blue telling me about her pain and suffering she endured from her husband's infidelity. Towards the end of our conversation, she confessed that after so many years she was still in pain and cannot forgive and move on.

I could not give her a simple explanation about moving on and what it really means to move on. I felt sad that I was not able to help her during our conversation.

"There is no need to feel sorry" the Universe came to my rescue.

"How can I simply explain to her about moving on? Sometimes you guys use explanation that is too vague requiring a Phd in philosophy just to understand it. Do you not use simple language with simple human terminology?"

"I can see your frustration"

"Yes I am pissed off" I protested.

"You must care for your relative?"

"Yes I do" feeling a lot calmer. Please forgive me I just swore at the Universe.

"You are forgiven. Let me tell you a story"

"That is a good start. I learn better relating to stories"

"Two monks went for a walk and they came across a young woman pregnant with child by a shallow fast flowing stream. The older monk went by the woman, picked her up and carried her across to the other side putting her down. The monks walked on in silence. 5 hours later as they were returning to their monastery, the other much younger monk couldn't restrain himself anymore. "Why did you touch the woman and even carried her on your shoulders across the stream? Monks are not allowed to do such things."

"I put the woman down hours ago - are you still carrying her?" was the older monk's reply.

"I see your meaning. My relative is still carrying the past in her - reliving it during every waking moment and in every conversation. She spent the whole conversation talking about how bad her ex-husband was and what he did that destroyed her. That happened 10 years ago. She is still an angry and resentful person."

"Living in the prison of your past memories is truly hell on earth, unable to let go of situations that happened in the past which has absolutely no relevance to the present."

"The past are but just thoughts/memories in your minds and they are never a part of your current situation. In fact thoughts in itself are not problems as you can learn from them. The real problem starts when you make these thoughts/memories as part of their current sense of self. In this instance you cannot separate thoughts in your mind and the true person you are now. In short your relative who was heart broken by her husband, has made her past part of who she is today even though her husband has remarried another woman. She has become a prisoner of her past memories. She will carry this burden of imprisonment as long as she allows these past thoughts to be part of the make up of who she is today."

"She still feels the pain she has enough of it and wants to Move On... but how?"

"By letting go of the woman by the stream"

"There you go again - being vague and philosophical, I need to know HOW DOES ONE MOVE ON?" finding myself banging on my keyboard in frustration.

"By not giving power to these past thoughts."

"By understanding that if you give power to these thoughts you are then living in a mind prison"

"By knowing that these past thoughts are just mind stories"

"By knowing that these past thoughts cannot stop you from choosing who you want to be today"

"By turning off this pre-recorded story in her mind"

"By recognising that these thoughts/memories have not relevance in her life situation anymore"

"By choosing to let go and move on"

My fingers are slipping off the keyboard, I am typing so fast. Phew I have just finished......

"Thank you again Universe"

"See you next time" 

I am not Me

At my bank a few years ago I noticed an elderly man, probably in his 80s, leaning over the teller's counter looking frustrated. He could not produce any acceptable form of ID to the teller and he was getting increasingly agitated trying to convince the teller who he was.

"Don't you know? I am me, I am me" quivering and waving his hands in the air much to the amusement of the other customers.

That was five years ago and I never gave the incident much thought until I hear this 2-year old girl at the park asking her mum for a drink.

"Amy wants a drink" pointing to her heart. It is as if there is another person inside her wanting a drink.

That got me thinking. If there is another person inside her that is "Amy" then who is this little girl who is doing the asking? That invokes the memory of the elderly man's statement at the bank. His "I am ME" must mean there is a "ME" inside his "I". Is there a message here?

"Amy..... full" the little girl thanks her mother, wiping her mouth and happily toddles off to the swings.

There must be two of us in every one of us. Arghhhhh!!

"What do you think?"  the Universe interrupts my thoughts.

"I don't know"

"You know messages come from unexpected people"

I subscribe to the belief that messages will come at appropriate times and they will come often enough for me to learn. The message from the elderly man and now this little girl must be for me to learn about "I" and "Me".

"So is there a truth about I and a ME and if so who is I and who is ME?" Feeling insane for even asking this question.

"You are not insane and yes there is a truth about I and ME. However, the only way to know this truth is to experience it. Explanations using words does not do it justice. Words merely point to the truth it doesn't give you the true knowledge. At best, words and labels provide a concept of the truth. Some people can convince you that durians are horrible and yet they have never tasted it themselves.

"I am not quite sure what you mean"

"Unfortunately most humans tend to associate their true self with the words and mental labels they develop for themselves as they grow up. Most humans loose this connection with their true self right from very young and replace their true self with words and mental labels learned from parents, friends, experiences or their own reading, and take as truth about themselves. In no time this concept of who they are, defined by those words are mistakenly taken to be the truth. Their true self is then forgotten."

"You are loosing me"

"Bear with me"

"The word "I" is perhaps the worst definition for the person who says it and unfortunately one of the most used words to describe who we are. The word "I" is an illusion and it is only a derived concept of who we truly are. It is a signpost pointing to the truth. Albert Einstein referred to this as "the optical illusion of consciousness" This signpost or illusion sets the basis of our definition of who we are - and with this illusion or the concept of ourselves, we relate to the world.

"Wooooo, what you are saying is that we are only showing a concept of who we are and assuming that this concept is the actual us?"

Scratching my head, unsure of what I am typing.

"The little girl Amy, has just learned from her parents to produce a sound from her vocal chords. The sound is "Amy" and she begins to have this thought in her mind that this sound - Amy - is who she is. Her parents have given her a concept of who this true person is. If you like, a representative of this true person or consciousness. The sound Amy then becomes a signpost pointing to this little girl's pure consciousness"

"As this girl grows she attaches more thoughts associated with this signpost. "Me" and "Mine" are possessive thoughts of objects that belong to this representative of her consciousness. This original thought is then further shaped by her experiences - both pleasant and unpleasant - acquired knowledge, opinions, likes and dislikes aggregated to then define the sense of self for this girl. It is this girl's "me and my story".

I need to clear my mind.... got to stop and have my cracker barrel cheese and biscuits.

"Enjoy!"

"I am back" with a freshly brewed flat white coffee ready to chip in when I need caffeine.

"So what happens to this original consciousness whilst Amy's representative is being defined and developed?"

"Nothing. Amy's consciousness maintains its innocence and beauty just as the day she was born. Just as the beauty of a flower that has inspired countless artist and poets. You just feel the presence of the flower's consciousness when you are amongst them and when you see them. Seeing a beautiful flower reminds us of the beauty that underlines each and every human. This beauty of a flower is the same beauty in a human. The innocence of other living beings, like a puppy, kitten or human baby is a window into the beauty of the underlining consciousness of all living things"

"So what you are saying is: as Amy grows, she continues to shape her concept of herself and becomes some form of an aggregated data of who she thinks she is. She could be a scientist, teacher, astronaut, mother, accountant - whatever she creates herself underneath this signpost, her consciousness remains the same. That is the consciousness of her innocence and beauty. And when she says "I am......" unhappy, sad, discarded by my lover/husband, etc it only defines her concept of herself not the true consciousness that lies underneath the "I". In short there is a true Me underneath Amy's I"

I am typing furiously now, I think I got it and I feel really weird to now know that there is a real "Me" underneath the "I" that I have created for myself in my years living on this earth.

Perhaps the little girl in the park and the elderly man I saw years ago are there to give me insight and the confidence to put this out there in my blog and running the risk of being branded insane or simply confused.

"Stop beating yourself up again and you are not insane"

"Thank you" I see Amy turning around and smiling knowingly at me - waving good-bye as her mum walks her home.  Thank you Amy for teaching me.

Happiness or Inner Peace You Choose

The worst of summer is probably over. The days are settling into an average of 30 degrees instead of the mid 40s. We have just celebrated the Chinese New Year, my family welcomed the year of the Snake with the all-important new year eve dinner. I get a plethora of well wishes on FB including wealthy, healthy, happy, etc but one stood out very clearly - he wished me inner peace. I did not think too much about the message until now - when I am at peace and yet again in my small side patio sipping my morning coffee.

"Wondered what is the difference between happiness and inner peace is?" Universe started this time before I had a chance to ask any questions.

"Oh now you are being pro active this morning?"

"You have asked this before but you have forgotten that you did"

I must have and who am I to argue with the Universe. OK so I did, then tell me more.

"Yes there is a clear difference. Happiness is dependent on some conditions being perceived as positive but inner peace does not"

"Well then to be happy will be simple. All I have to do is change my attitude and think positive on all matters all the time. So where does inner peace comes in?"

"Do you truly know what positive is and what negative is? Sometimes you may think that your experience is positive only to turn into a negative experience? Known of people who had a wonderful love-filled romantic wedding then turning into a disastrous and bitter divorce later?" Or people who have changed their lives drastically for the better after a heart attack or near-death experience? In essence there is neither positive nor negative in the larger perspective. Situations are just as they are"

"Huh? I cannot pretend that things are good when an obvious bad thing has happened? Death, accidents, illness or pain are not good and I cannot simply deny that it is not bad. That would be self deceiving wouldn't it?"

"You are not pretending, you are simply allowing the situation to be as it is. Obviously when your loved one has a major accident of has just died, you cannot be happy about it. But you can be at peace with it - you can be crying and feel the loss, but you can still be at ease with the death or accident. Once you accept the situation and allow the situation to be - you will find underneath this sadness or unhappiness the presence of quiet strength. It is sacred. This is...... inner peace. A place where there is no good nor bad."

"This is all too difficult to understand. Can you give me a simpler example?"

"Imagine you are sitting on your balcony enjoying the fresh evening breeze. Then the foul smelling cooking from your neighbour wafts in once again. They are foreigners in our country and cooking their strange smelling food.  Almost immediately they spoil the fresh evening breeze of yours. To top it off your neighbour adulterate the quiet neighbourhood you live in with their loud voices and communal dining. Annoyance and then anger arises in you. "How could they be so insensitive", you start justifying your anger. "I am going to Twit about this and also going to write about them on FB, I might even write an article in my daily newspaper column teaching them how to behave in our country" - you continue to fuel your anger and before long it spills into an all out revenge."

"OK what is your point?" I am getting impatient, as Universe is taking too long.

"Observe yourself - that is precisely my point"

"Is there a need to be annoyed with your neighbours? What does this annoyance do for you? And is there a need to take revenge?"

"What else can I do? I have a right too don't I?"

"Allow things to be as it is. Try this - instead of letting this smell or noise build in you - just imagine yourself to be transparent. Imagine the smell and noise just simply going through you. Imagine that you are NO THING - just an empty space and the smell and noise simply passes through you. You have no resistance. This no-resistance is your inner peace unaffected by neither smell nor noise."

"Well if my neighbour continues to be loud and affect not just me but others in my community do we not do something about it? Do we just simply accept and let things get out of hand? Can we not at least compromise?"

"If you ever need to do something then it is fine. But do it from this inner peace. Whatever you do from this inner peace will be done in the right way and at the right moment. It will come from a quiet need to effect a change or strike a compromise. There will be no blaming no accusation just a smooth conduit to find a solution. More importantly, whatever you do will not be from anger or revenge, it will be done from a calm disposition. In this way annoyance, anger and revenge has not place. Don't you think so?"

Silence..........

"....by the way, the neighbour's story I just told you? - its a true story that happened in one country in South East Asian. Sad isn't it?"

Silence again.

Ebookstore Gateway

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The iPad monk

We just experienced a heat wave last week with temperatures reaching mid 40s. My new lawn and plants screamed for water by the end of each day.

Fortunately the weather has improved and I have just woken up sitting up in my bed enjoying the respite provided by the awesome power of nature. It is as if the Universe has decided to let us know - not to take things for granted and enjoy the value of each day presented to us.

I hear the familiar "Triiing" sound coming from my phone, telling me I have an SMS.

"Surrender to divine authority means liberation from physical illusions, not from the delights and the comfort of physical life" - an SMS from my daughter.

"Dad do you remember our discussion about the monk we saw who had an iPad?" she followed with another SMS. What a heavy subject so early in the morning.

Of course I remember the discussion we had, it revolved around the topic - should spiritual enlightenment be synonymous to poverty or living in abstinence?

Our discussion centred on a monk we saw in a shopping centre who had an iPad in his hand. He also had a number of shopping bags drabbed over his shoulders. I remember thinking the monk stood out like a sore thumb, as if a monk with an iPad shopping in an up-market shopping centre does not belong to each other.

The SMS from my daughter makes so much sense as it hits the nail right on the head - surrendering to divine authority does not necessarily mean spiritually connected people should live a life of poverty and in servitude.

"Indeed a good discussion" Universe started.

"Oh you have an opinion about this?" pulling out my iPad.

" I have a question?"

"Shoot" frantically typing away on my iPad. (I am not a monk)

"Why do you assume that a Buddhist monk, or indeed any religious person, OUGHT TO live in abstinence, stripped to the most basic level of subsistence living, devoid of normal human physical needs, comforts and convenience of everyday modern life?"

I had to think about this question and after about 5 minutes the best I could scrap up is...

"That is normal. Everyone knows that and I also see most religious people doing just that. They sacrifice their lives for spiritual growth"

"What is normal may not necessarily be natural"

"Smoking has been considered normal behaviour for as long as you can remember and in some societies a mandatory mark of adulthood. People caught in fires generally die of asphyxiation through smoke inhalation and not from burns and yet we fill our lungs out with the same smoke that kills. Would you call this normal behaviour natural?"

"OK, I see your point - are you then saying that religious figures can then be multi millionaires, drive BMWs and live in grandiose mansion?" A good question I thought.

"Heard of the saying: Man does not live on bread alone?"

"In 1 Corinthian 6:12 it is also said "Everything is permissible for me, but I will not be mastered by anything"

"Siddharta Gautama did not achieve enlightenment until he lived a balanced life and stopped submitting himself to a life of rigorous ascetic practices"

"Countless pain and suffering are being brought about by people trying to find salvation through deprivation of the body. The only way to find salvation is through the body not away from it."

"And your point being, the only naturally way to head towards a spiritual life, is striking a balanced lifestyle, one that is right for us individually?"

"What I am saying is, deprivation of the natural needs of the body does not guarantee anyone a path to attaining spiritual growth. We all have our individual paths as we fulfil the agendas of our souls. We all have a reason for being on this earth in our physical forms and the only way we experience our agendas is through the temple of the spirit called body. So look after it, care for it, fine-tune it as it is only in this physical body form you receive salvation"

"So it is our perception that categorises what being spiritual is all about? Up till now I have automatically assumed that when someone dresses in some form of uniform, deprive themselves and live a community of relatively simple life and practice some form of religious rituals  - is more spiritual than me. I almost automatically give the person respect because of this perspective of mine. In fact I always feel inadequate in their presence and yearn to have what they have or what I perceive that they may have. And if they live 'our lives' like shopping in a shopping centre and having a haircut, we automatically assume that they have succumbed to our non-spiritual lives. I am kinda stuffed up you would say."

"You want to stop beating yourself up . You must remember you too have your own journey"

"So what you are saying is: I may be as, if not more spiritual than those monks or religious figures I encounter in my life?"

"I repeat, you want to stop beating yourself up and stay in the know that you too have your own journey"

"OK ok"

"I have more questions. What does a balanced lifestyle mean? What is right for me may not be right for the others? How do I know if enough is enough? How do I know I am not depriving myself?....."

"You will when you know"

"What kind of answer is that? It does not make sense.... I need more answer"

Silence.......

I guess the Universe has enough.

What is Forgiving

What a beautiful morning, birds are chirping and the pigeons are creating a cacophony with their ‘poo cooing’. I have just finished my fresh lemon drink and oats for breakfast – settling into the chair to enjoy the present moment. I am on the side patio and the gentle breeze provides respite from yesterday’s heat.

Flicking through my Facebook I notice a posting in the feed. It is one of those wisdom card which reads:

‘Do not judge others as you do not walk their footsteps’ so true. Sometimes we are all judge too quickly.

“Do you truly know what it really means?” Universe started, startling me. I am not expecting this.

“Not now Universe, I do not have my computer to type your words” panicking and clearing the table in preparation for my laptop.

“No need for the laptop – you will recall all these later. Don’t panic” Universe continues

“A bit presumptuous of you there, are you sure I will recall our conversation?” I protest.

“Have faith” If I have not mistaken, it sounded like it was coming from one of the pigeons. I am going insane; I actually understand the poo-cooing? Arghhhhh!

“You are not and don’t be silly” I am reassured.

“So do you know what those words you just read mean?” Universe continues.

“So let me see. I think I got this one. The words simply say to me – not to judge others as I do not know what their experience in life is. Simply isn't it?”

“Yes it is simple and No you have not got it”

“Arghhh, so frustrating God help me” thinking aloud.

“I will”

Then the Universe goes into this spill......

“Let us start with the last few words ‘you don’t walk their footsteps’ and I will tell you a story to help you. Once upon a time up in ‘God Land” where all beautiful spirits reside……..”

“Sounds like it’s going to be a long one here”

“Stop interrupting”

“Sorry” I thought

“Accepted”

“Where was I? In this God Land there are plenty of happy, smiling and peaceful spirits going about enjoying being Perfect. One curious little spirit, let’s call it SP1, shoots a question at the ‘big boss’, and let’s call big boss God.

SP1: “God I know I am Perfect but how come I do not feel Perfect?”

“That is a very good question SP1” God answers and continues

“What part of perfection do you not feel?”

SP1 thinks for a while then reply;

“Well Perfection is about loving, forgiving, helping, being content, peaceful, joyous, etc etc etc” SP1 must have seen the movie The King & I.

“So what part of Perfection do you not feel?” God clarifies.

“Well, can I feel again ‘Forgiving’ because I really do not remember what it feels like to forgive” SP1 smiles.

“OK if that is what you want, SP1, I will grant it to you. But for you to feel what it is like to forgive, you will need some other entity to forgive.” waving another spirit over – SP2, a big smile on SP2’s face. God does cause entities to smile.

“Hey SP2, can you please help us? Your friend, SP1 here wants to feel forgiveness. I would need you to be the entity that SP1 forgives and to do that you will need to do something horrible and nasty to SP1. In this way SP1 has a reason to forgive you. Is this arrangement OK?” God is most diplomatic.

“Of course, I love SP1 and I want to help as much as I can” SP2 still smiling and SP1 nods enthusiastically.

Then God continues…. “However, in order that SP1 truly knows and truly understands and thus feel forgiveness, I will need to cause you two to forget this arrangement. Otherwise it will not be a real feeling. And in order to let you feel I will need to convert you two into physical forms so that SP1 can feel forgiveness through this physical form”

“That sounds cool” SP1 and SP2 ‘poo cooes’ in unison.

So with a wave of the hand God transforms SP1 and SP2 into human forms, causing both of them to forget their arrangement. In the human world, and true to form SP2 did a horrible thing to SP1 so bad that it almost destroys SP1 physically and emotionally. After a time frame through suffering and pain, SP1 finds strength to forgive SP2 and in doing so feels the weight of pain and suffering lifting as soon as Forgiveness is experienced.”
“I get it , I get it……” I interrupted.

“What did you get?” Universe answered.

“The words ‘you do not walk their footsteps’ mean that I do not know my own soul’s agenda or indeed the agenda of every person I meet and connect with. Be they friends or enemies, they all serve a purpose in my human life and they all have a prior arrangement with me. Although I really do not know what the agenda is, or the arrangements are, everyone I meet is here to help me fulfill what I am sent to this world for. So we really should not judge others too quickly, especially our enemies as they too have a purpose in my life – even if it means for them to hurt me. I should therefore bless everyone………” I am now jumping off my chair rushing to turn my laptop on.

“bye bye my dear SP1”

I have no time to say good bye to Universe…… just need to type these words.

Whew DONE !!!!!!!

Meditation

Here I am another jam toast in hand, another morning and a hot Maconna coffee waiting for another conversation.

"Come on talk to me!" I challenged.

I can only hear the pigeon "poo cooing" and an enthusiastic bird chirping.
I close my eyes, settling into the symphony of bird chatter' - focussing on my breath. 

"Define meditation" Universe started
"You are kidding me?" Sitting up, my eyes wide open, putting my jam toast on the plate and reaching for the keyboard. I wanted to record everything that comes out of this conversation.

"Everyone tells me different things about what meditation is. What do you think it is?" furiously typing.
"It's not what you think?"
"Elusive as usual" I thought.
"I am not" it said. Damn it reads my mind. I better be careful here.
"There is no need to be careful" it reassured. 

"If you can dis-associate with your mind, then you will find that there is a real presence behind the incessant thinking of your mind."

"Wow hold it old fellow, no need to get too heavy so early in the morning" surely it is not asking me to be "out of my mind?"

"Have you tried observing your thoughts?" It continued.

"Yep it is asking me to be out of my mind" My fingers could not stop typing.

"If you can draw back and be the observer of your thoughts. You will suddenly find that amongst the incessant chatter in your mind, there is another presence that is there just above the chatter. It is the omnipresent consciousness that exists before, during and after the activity called thinking." 

My fingers are going crazy pounding on the keyboard.

" Observe your mind's thinking, accept whatever the thinking is, do not judge, do not be part of it and do not participate. Just simply BE the one observing your thoughts. When you do that, you will suddenly find a duality happening. On the one hand there is this mind that is doing the thinking and the other a presence that is simply observing the thinking. When this happens you would have dis-associated with your mind or putting it simply you have created a gap. This gap is called NO MIND and when you are in this NO MIND you will feel an immediate sense of calm and at-one-ment with the present. Your senses will be sharper; the pigeons sound ever clearer, your jam toast tasting better. It may only happen for a split second initially but with practice this NO MIND will last longer. When you do it long and often enough, you will eventually bath in an overwhelming sense of peace and connection with your inner soul. When you do you are in true meditation. Every time you become the observer of your thinking mind you are in meditation"

I am absolutely blown away.

"Is this your answer to my question during our last conversation about living a fulfilled life?" I am typing so fast my fingers are slipping off the keyboard. 

"Yes" and with this..... silence!

Looking at my untouched coffee, thinking about a book I read a number of times about 8 years ago years ago and it is revisiting me this morning. 

"Thanks dear Universe, you have reminded me about this book" as I enter the gap.....

Fulfillment

As I sit here in the quietness of the day's morning, sipping coffee and chewing on my jam toast, I ponder the meaning of "living in fulfillment". I know there are a host of wonderful quotes defining this concept and almost all of them are meaningful. In short they all make sense conceptually.

One particular quote come to mind "To live a fulfilled life, live a peaceful life and you will find happiness and fulfillment."

I must be stupid, I have read this concept in many New Age books (or ebooks) but it still leaves a void in me. How can we do it? I cannot help but ask the question 'how?' How does one be happy? How does one be peaceful? How, how, how?

Then the "I" in me said "It has nothing to do with how"

"huh?" sitting up gulping down my coffee.

"It has to do with Being" wiping jam off my pyjama pants.

"What do you mean?" feeling foolish replying to "I"

Then "I" continued leaving me flabbergasted.
"Being is but a state of mind. There is nothing you can or need to do to be in this state of mind. You simply create the state of mind you choose to BE and then you will be"

"How?"getting agitated. "I" is really toying with my emotions now. I am going to give this "I" a good run for his/her money. Like a good consultant I am going to stay one step ahead of the client.

I then said "I know your answer. It has nothing to do with how, all you need is to create a space in your own consciousness and fill that consciousness with serene and calm disposition. Then from this space you look at your day or your situation and treat each day or the situation with this peaceful disposition. In this way you cannot help but BE peaceful."

With this "I" was silent. I managed to shut "I" up.

Finishing my coffee and my cold toast, I settled into my chair savouring the answer given by me.

"Correct" taking me by surprise.

With this answer "I" took leave allowing me to swallow my last mouthful of jam toast. At the most critical moment the Universe refuses to talk any more. Gulping cold coffee, I vow to return to this spot to take on "I" again.

I need to have a shower now.